T.M.D.G.

I am suffering from a strong case of T.M.D.G. (Too Many Darn Goats). This is a seasonal disorder that strikes goat farmers small and large in the fall and the spring of the year. The disease comes on gradually during these times of year, but illness can be induced at any time by the addition of one or more animals to the goat herd. The symptoms include:

Dizziness - while trying to count all your goats

 Nausea - when looking at the feed bill

Anxiety - about hoof trimming and vaccination days

Increased heart rate - during pen cleaning

Unexpected weight gain – from drinking all that extra goat milk

Unexpected weight loss – from chasing new additions around the pastures

Knee or back pain – while moving all those hay bales to feed the goats

Headaches – from trying to figure out where to put all your goats

Symptoms can be alleviated by the subtraction of one or more goats from the goat herd. Also applications of large sums of money tend to provide temporary relief through building a bigger barn or more goat houses. The only permanent cure is the removal of all goats from the farm.